EMDR Trauma Retreat: Day 4

Day 4 began much like the others, only we looped back to resourcing. We talked through my resources again and decided to add a new one, specifically to help carry me or walk with me through the car crash that I'm so terrified to process. I chose Thor as my resource for his strength, nobility and worthiness.

We strengthened all my resources together as a sort of "power team" and set off for the day. There were a few instances where I thought for sure my brain was going to take me to the car crash, but instead it moved inside my body to feel different body sensations. There is a great book that explains that and a workbook that goes along with it. I highly recommend them!

We processed through a good bunch of memories today and even though we were prepared, we didn't need Thor. The plan is to attack the car crash tomorrow. This is my mantra to get me through tonight:

I'm not sure what all I plan to do tonight but I plan to be gentle. In the meantime, here is a video that explains more about the EMDR processing process. Just figured I'd share in case you wanted to watch a demonstration of what it looks like. We're using the hand buzzies as it's way less exhausting than the other methods for extended periods of use. Until tomorrow!

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Walt Disney and heading home

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EMDR Trauma Retreat: Day 8

Today was Day 8 of the Trauma Retreat which can otherwise be known as an EMDR Intensive. We tackled 2 more triggers today, my dad's death from AML and my POTS diagnosis and my continual struggle with it. We did some positive future resource building on my POTS and dealing with my inner critic. We did a little bit more parts work and identified some of the values my wise adult possesses. We also talked through defense mechanisms, how to challenge negative thoughts and several other helpful things. I was also challenged that instead of Keeping it Real (like I like to do) that I should consider Keeping it Kind. This really needs to start with me being kind to myself. It's something I will ponder on. Then they set me loose - just kidding! They dropped me off downtown Denver at a hotel I'd reserved for my next part of this adventure. I knew that I would need to spend more time healing after finishing up my EMDR adventure so I'm not headed back to AZ (home) just yet. Sta...

Alone Until Eternity

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