Skip to main content

Alone

I should not have to do this alone. I should not have to send 2 girls back to school in the morning instead of 3. Back to school time used to be fun. It's terrifying. Seeing all of the school supplies E used to beg me for at the store and knowing that now it's too late to give in and get them for her. She doesn't have a locker to decorate this year. No 5th grader this year. Only kids at 2 schools. Just me. Just me to make sure the girls make it on the bus, have a lunch made, have all their supplies and papers signed. Just me. I don't want to do this. I don't want them to have a school year where their dad isn't here to help them, help me. I don't want to.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Walt Disney and heading home

 I was able to visit the Walt Disney Family Museum before I headed home. It was a great stop for me and it was fascinating.  I was able to see the WW2 exhibit they had but pictures weren’t allowed. After that, I headed to the airport to fly home. My puppies were so happy to see me!
Post a Comment
Read more

EMDR Trauma Retreat: Day 1

 I arrived in Denver, CO last night after a wonderful delayed flight and a nice wait on the tarmac.  I eventually collected my bag and met my ride from 11th Hour Trauma Retreat for a ride to the hotel. Thankfully, there were no more delays. Checking into the hotel was easy-peasy. My hotel room came with a little kitchen area, which came in handy because all the restaurants were already closed by the time I arrived. The front desk sold a small collection of frozen dinners, ice cream and sodas - so I was all set. I unpacked and collapsed into bed.  The hotel provides breakfast every morning, which is a great bonus! My therapist picked me up from the hotel at 8am and we were off for a full day of therapy fun. Haha!  We started the morning off with lots of paperwork, which included different assessments for depression, anxiety, and other things. We talked about the basics of EMDR and how talk therapy works vs EMDR and why they are both important in healing. We took break...
2 comments
Read more

EMDR Trauma Retreat: Day 8

  Today was Day 8 of the Trauma Retreat which can otherwise be known as an EMDR Intensive. We tackled 2 more triggers today, my dad's death from AML and my POTS diagnosis and my continual struggle with it. We did some positive future resource building on my POTS and dealing with my inner critic. We did a little bit more parts work and identified some of the values my wise adult possesses. We also talked through defense mechanisms, how to challenge negative thoughts and several other helpful things.  I was also challenged that instead of Keeping it Real (like I like to do) that I should consider Keeping it Kind. This really needs to start with me being kind to myself. It's something I will ponder on. Then they set me loose - just kidding! They dropped me off downtown Denver at a hotel I'd reserved for my next part of this adventure. I knew that I would need to spend more time healing after finishing up my EMDR adventure so I'm not headed back to AZ (home) just yet. Sta...
Post a Comment
Read more